America Faces A New Threat: Ajax

Written by The Blackspot

Thursday, 6 December 2001

image for America Faces A New Threat: Ajax
So fresh, so clean

Patrons of a Bedford Stuyvesant White Castle fast-food restaurant in Brookly, NY, were shocked when they found traces of powdered Ajax throughout the establishment.

"I walked into the bathroom and it was clean--except for some blue-ish powder around the toilet," said witness Jamar Marks.

"Later that day I felt lightheaded and nervous; like I was in shock. When I thought about it, it had to be Ajax. The bathroom was just too clean."

The manager of the restaurant mandated an investigation of all employees to determine who might have been responsible for cleaning up the White Castle--which in most cases are filthy, bacteria breeding grounds.

Authorities believe that the Ajax might have been used as a weapon to confuse people into thinking that fast-food restaurants in urban areas of the city are sanitary. As a result, the very shock of seeing a clean establishment can be too much to for the nervous system to handle.

Investigations into terrorist groups like people who hand out strip-club fliers and college-based bootleg perfume peddlers are heavily underway. Five others have been confirmed to have been affected by the Ajax while others are still being tested.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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