Jesse Jackson Confesses: Profanity was Preparation for "George Carlin Titillating Tribute"

Funny story written by AAJetMan

Friday, 18 July 2008

image for Jesse Jackson Confesses: Profanity was Preparation for "George Carlin Titillating Tribute"
Rainbow Coalition Members Line up for tickets to Jackson's "Carlin Tribute"

(New York) American civil rights activist Jesse Jackson today admitted to recent vulgarites, but claimed "I was just trying material for my George Carlin titillating stand-up comedy tribute", scheduled for Friday at Duke's Fuqua School of Business.

Quick to assuage criticism, Jackson spoke publicly at a Harlem gathering of his Rainbow Coalition, his shiatsu at his side.

"Hell, I'm a Baptist Minister." He continued, "You think I'm gonna use that language in public? No, man, this was just schtick" Jackson added.

Jackson described the tribute as a compilation of his own recently recorded expletives strategically designed to approximate Carlin's immortal "Seven Words You Can Never Say on Television", first aired over 30 years ago.

Surprisingly, the often left-maligned Fox News offered Jackson complete assistance in promoting his perversions, recorded predominantly by Fox.

A Fox reporter stated that in an "off-air but oh-so-live-mic" discussion with Fox, the reverend "dropped the N-word, and continued on a vile rant against (Democratic Presidential nominee Barack) Obama. We caught it all on tape, and are eager to promote the reverend's routine."

Jackson dismissed questions following the speech, stating "I gotta go. My 2008 4-door Passant's waiting for me."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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