The hit comedy show Friends will today replace all US elections.
Speaking from a cheap plastic set in New York City, actress and all-round stunning babe Lisa Kudrow said: 'OK, Condi is sexier and older, but I'm blonder and whiter and Polisher!'
And the other girl, whoever she is, added: 'Well, it's not about looks and skin, it's about looks and skin.'
Resident sidekick idiot Joey 'Bush' Joe wandered in and added: 'American elections funny? About as funny as Friends! Ba da boom!' And sensitive-but-witty-like-a-puppy-that-needs-mothering Barack O'Chandler said :'Yeah.'
Some have questioned the constitutional validity of replacing the US election with an unfunny boring soap opera, but others didn't notice the difference.
Fresh from her daily 8-hour makeup session, Senator Hillary Clinton said: 'I was named after Jennifer Aniston's washing machine - shame somebody left it on the wrinkle cycle for too long.'
And occasional guest star Sir Edward O'Kennodontist added: 'It'll be easy, all you have to do is smile and talk drivel - not sure about Friends though, that may be more of a challenge for American politicians.'
The United Kingdom is 402 later this week.
