Valerie Plame and the Politics of Cooking

Funny story written by Chuck Terzella

Sunday, 2 May 2004

Ambassador Joseph Wilson, whose allegations that his wife, ex CIA Operative Valerie Plame's outing by the White House is the topic of his newly published book, ‘The Politics of Truth'. In it, Ambassador Wilson names as a possible suspect in the leak to the nationally syndicated columnist Robert Novak, who printed Ms. Plame's name and occupation as a secret agent, Vice President Dick (Dick) Cheney's Chief of Staff Scooter Libby.

Ambassador Wilson postulates that the outing of his wife was done in retaliation for a speech Wilson gave disputing the Administrations allegations that Iraq had tried to buy radioactive "yellowcake" from Niger. The CIA had sent Wilson to Niger to investigate the Administrations claims, but he could find no evidence to support it and said so publicly.

While the public naming of a CIA operative is a Federal crime, the White House has come up with a novel defense. Unnamed White House Source Wegman (Pudgy) Waterhouse, speaking on the condition of anonymity said, "Well, of course naming a Central Intelligence Agency operative would be a crime, but that's not what we thought Valerie Plame was. You see, we thought that Valerie Plame was an employee of The Culinary Institute of America, also known as the CIA. It's a great cooking school located outside of Poughkeepsie, New York. I had a rack of lamb there in their restaurant that was to die for. The Chateau Mouton-Rothschild was a bit corked I think but still, overall, it was great. The point is, there's no crime in naming a chef is there? We had no idea she was a spy, after all, she was undercover, right?"

When asked if he thought that the White House would actually get away with that excuse Waterhouse, speaking on the condition of more anonymity replied, "Come on, what with Fallujah and Najaf, Cheney's energy policy, tortured prisoners of war, Americans being held without legal counsel, and several hundred dead soldiers, do you think anyone's even gonna remember one CIA agent?"

(This story was edited by ZiaUl-Hack...thank you)

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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