Loonie Becomes New World Reserve Currency

Funny story written by Nowido

Thursday, 1 November 2007

image for Loonie Becomes New World Reserve Currency
Former World Currency Rejected

After an emergency meeting of the Finance Ministers of the G-186 here in the capital city of Gaborone situated along the beautiful Limpopo river, it was decided that all member States of the G-186 would use the Loonie, or as its officially known as the Canadian Dollar, in place of the US Dollar in all international settlements.

For those not familiar with the G-186, it is an organization of all regular members of the United Nations except the United States of America. It is currently led by a five member committee of the States of Albania, Belize, Botswana, Moldova and Togo with Botswana currently its chief executive position of the ruling committee. Botswana is one of the most dynamic members of the G-186 with growth well in excess of most other members and a teeming population of almost 2 million citizens.

The Honorable Baledzi Gaolathe Minister of Finance for Botswana presented the groups official statement at a press briefing in the capital city today. "The G-186 Finance Ministers have voted almost unanimously to replace the US Dollar with the Canadian Dollar or as it is sometimes known 'The Loonie' as the official world reserve currency. This choice was taken as the only means possible to protect the value of our foreign currency reserves. This measure has been discussed with the Bank for International Settlement in Basel Switzerland and they are in full agreement."

A spokesperson for Mr Gaolathe briefed the press on several aspects which figured into the final decision. The Loonie is now more valuable the Dollar exchanging currently above 1.05 Loonies to the Dollar. He said that this is the first time in many decades in which this has occurred.

In the general discussions leading up to the final decision many reasons were considered. The group was of the opinion that after taking into account all foreign and domestic obligations against the US Dollar, that the only real asset which the United States could call upon in case of emergency, like right now, was the potential encumbering of its population of over 20 million illegal immigrants. The members considered this possibility but rejected this notion as not being possible until the upcoming election is completed.

On the other hand, Canada has untold riches represented by it vast timberlands, minerals, farms, diligent working population and cool rock music all of which are free and clear of most liens. In addition the spokesman said, "How could anyone not love the cute polar bear cubs and white baby seals.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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