Wrong Arm Attached To Victim Of Farming Accident

Funny story written by Blind Fool -••-

Wednesday, 21 January 2004

LAWRENCE, KANSAS-A man who lost his arm to a dangerous piece of farm equipment awoke from surgery the next morning to discover that the wrong arm had been attached.

Hospital officials claim that they stitched on the bloody arm that [Jake] Pitts, the victim, brought in that day. Further inspection revealed that Mr. Pitts, a white male, had a black man's arm instead of his own.

If that were not bizarre enough, it was also discovered that it's a left-handed arm which now gives him two left arms. At that point the investigation started to concentrate on the victim.

"Right after it [the accident] happened, I reached in, felt around, grabbed the blood-stained arm, hopped in my truck, and drove myself here to the hospital," said Pitts. "They wheeled me into the operating room, put me under, and plopped it on."

This testimony lead investigators to the field where it happened. Engineers disassembled the machine in hopes of finding out exactly what happened.

Inside the bowels of the metal beast they found five severed arms (one of which belong to Mr. Pitts), two feet, and an ear.

The farm equipment has since been quarantined and is under investigation for several unsolved dismemberment cases.

Showing a good sense of humor, Mr. Pitts retorted, "At least I can now shake hands with myself."


The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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