Written by King David

Sunday, 4 March 2007

image for God names dream team for 2008 presidential cabinet
He wants you!

It was announced today, by God, that He is tired of playing second stringers and having to pinch-hit from behind and is ready to announce His dream team for the presidential cabinet of 2008.

"No lightweights will be allowed on this team," said God. "I will not spare any expense in having these people in place."

Leading the line-up at president should be American journalist Bill Moyers. Moyers was a special assistant to President Johnson from 1963-1967 and played a key role in organizing and supervising the 1964 Great Society initiative under Johnson and served as chief of staff from 1964-1966.

He also served as White House Press Secretary under Johnson and was appointed as associate director, then Deputy Director for the newly created Peace Corps under Kennedy before his assassination.

In addition to public service, Moyers has served for over 57 years as a journalist, has both oral and written command of the English language, has demonstrated humility and proved himself to be an inquisitive person with complex and alluringly deft thinking skills. He's also from Texas and would have been Molly Ivans choice too.

God's choice for Vice President would go to General Wesley Clark. Clark has proven himself through a lifetime of military service which includes distinguished scholarship and time spent in both the Vietnam and Kosovo Wars.

He has won a number of military service awards such as Defense Distinguished Service Medal, Legion of Merit, Silver Star and Bronze Star Medal and has served in the upper echelon of Army top brass over Supreme Headquarters for Allied Powers in Europe, United States European Command and United States Southern Command controlling the KKK.

Besides a lifetime of service in the military, he has experience in the military which is needed to balance the notion of the "philosopher king's" presidency, giving the administration confidence and pragmatic grounding in military affairs which the former administration had absolutely zilch.

God's choice for Secretary of State and Foreign Affairs goes to Governor of New Mexico Bill Richardson. Spending more than 14 years as a US Congressman, Richardson kept a keen interest in foreign relations visiting Nicaragua, Guatemala, Cuba, Peru, India, North Korea, Bangladesh, Nigeria, and Sudan to represent U.S. interests.Clinton also appointed him as U.S. Ambassador to the United Nations. Hispanic-American himself, Richardson is not a zenophobe nor is he afraid of himself.

Al Gore will be Energy Secretary. Even though he pays $3,000 a month power bill to fuel his mansion, it's all from green sources.

Former Texas State Agriculture Commissioner and author of the book, The Only Thing In The Middle of the Road are Yellow Stripes and Dead Armadillos, Jim Hightower would be Secretary of Agriculture.

Barak Obama or U.S. Congressman from Michigan, John Conyers for U.S. Treasurer. Both are black men and are tired of being robbed by rich white men. It's their turn to hold onto the cash.

Ralph Nadar or Elliot Spencer for Attorney General because both men know how to keep American corporate interest in its place.

For Secretary of Labor, God wants human rights activist and founder and president of FLOC (Florida Latinos On Call), Baldemar Velasquez because that's who is doing all the work in America right now.

-Sacha Baron Cohen for Secretary of Humor and Journalistic Surprises;
-Former President Bill Clinton for Secretary of Infidelity;
-Clint Eastwood for Secretary of Cinematography,
-Arnold Schwarzenegger for Secretary of Muscle;
-Maine Senator William Cohen for Secretary of Defense;
-Al Sharpton for Secretary of the Press;
-John, or Elizabeth Edwards for Secretary of Health and Human Services;
-John McCain for Secretary of Veteran Affairs;
-Martha Stewart for Secretary of the Interior;
-Maxine Waters, or Barbara Lee for Secretary of Housing;
-Dennis Kucinich for the newly created position of Secretary of Peace
-and five-year-old Maddie Poplars for Secretary of Kindergarten Education.

In other news today, America's Peace Academy will soon be opening it's doors.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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