The Bunker And Trump

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Thursday, 4 June 2020

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"Yeah, Trump's going to church."

Of course, he didn’t run to the White House basement bunker to hide when he heard protesters across the lawn on Pennsylvania Avenue. He just decided that was a good time to examine the bunker.

It was a “Look, see”. See if the bunker had a television, kitchenette, bed, toilet, and if there was an underground tunnel that led to the Potomac River, and a waiting speedboat to zoom him to the Atlantic, make a right-hand turn, and head south to Mar-a- Lago.

He was never afraid. Nah. He’s tough. He-man tough.

“Did Melania go with him?” She wasn’t awake.

Press secretary Kayleigh McEnany hastily explained, “There is nothing unusual about working underground. Winston Churchill worked from an underground room during World War II.”

News Flash: Ms. McEnany, Winston Churchill was fighting the Nazis during World War II, not British protesters. Also, bombs and rocket bombs were being dropped on London by the German Luftwaffe on a nightly basis.

The D.C. protesters hadn’t taken over the U.S. Air Force, and they were not dropping bombs on Washington D.C. or the White House. Trump scurried down to the basement bunker for safety. The guy was freaking scared. He was going to make a fast getaway on a speedboat. There are rumors he got as far as South Carolina when told the protesters at the White House had gone home to bed.

So, Trump had the speedboat make a U-turn and head north.

The next day, (after mounted police removed new protesters from across the White House using tear gas and smoke bombs), Trump emerged from his bunker. Flanked by about fifty male White House office workers and the Secretary of Defense, Trump triumphantly walked across the street to stand in front of St. John’s Church. He held a bible above his head.

Over his head? Why the Bible? Better a copy of Elementary Spelling or a history book on the London Blitz.

Read more by this author:

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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