White House Compares Trump’s Speech To Churchill

Funny story written by K.C. Bell

Wednesday, 3 June 2020

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"Churchill and Trump? Like steak and a haggis."

The White House today compared Donald J’s speech at St. John’s Episcopal Church to that of Winston Churchill.


Yes. The World War II Prime Minister of Great Britain? Stop laughing. There are a lot of similarities there.

For starters, both wear shoes. Yes. They both also wear socks, trousers, shirts, and ties. Churchill stood at five feet and six inches. Without shoe lifts, no one knows the true height of Donald Trump. While he walks with a wobble, he is still considerably taller than Winston Churchill.

Winston Churchill was most famous for his oratorical triumphs. Trump can’t talk. He can barely read a speech. When he goes off script, he passes off the ruff and goes way off near the mudflats by the railroad yard, where the junkyard dogs live. “Take her out,” was voiced as one of Trump’s orders.

Oratorically, Trump can’t hold a candle to Churchill. Not a match, or even the memory of a flame. The guy comes off as dumb. Churchill was always brilliant whether in a quick reply or a lengthy speech. A quick reply from Trump would consist of, “No, you’re the puppet”, or “She’d do anything for a campaign contribution”, and other misspelled comments.

Churchill once said, “He is a modest man, and has a great deal to be modest about.” While Trump also has a great deal to be modest about, he was never a modest man. He is blatantly public about his ignorance and his incompetency. “Use Clorox.”

So when the White House tries to compare the two as brilliant soulmates, they should stop. The two do not resemble one another in beliefs, attitudes, honor, or ideology.

One was brilliant. The other is, oh well...

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The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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