Written by Catchthisdrift

Tuesday, 16 September 2014

image for Local Teen Wants More People To Not Get Him: Wants to be more mysterious
Austin Smithers' favorite snack

Cumberland, MN - A local teenager is frustrated that not more people don't get him and don't consider him a brooding deep-thinker who they find intriguingly mysterious.

Austin Smithers, 17, who is a junior at Walter Mondale High School in Cumberland, wrote a diary entry on Monday in which he expressed his dissatisfaction with his reputation. His 15 year old sister then posted the diary entry to her Facebook page on Tuesday, with the notation "Look what my loser brother wrote in his diary!"

According to his sister's Facebook page, Smithers' diary entry said: "I am dark and brooding. I am mysterious. I don't understand why people can't see that. Why do people say I'm awkward and socially inept? I am NOT! I am a deep thinker! I think deep relevant profound thoughts!! I am like no one else at school. They don't think deep thoughts. I wonder what mom's making for supper? I hope it isn't pasta again. Why does pasta come in all those different shapes? That right there is a deep thought. Other people look at things and just accept them. I look at things and wonder why. Why is pasta shaped that way? How did Bermuda grass migrate to this country? Why are all the hot girls intimidated by my mysterious deep broodiness?"

Smithers, who is considered awkward and socially inept by everyone who knows him, likes to spend his evenings playing video games and eating gummi bears after he completes his homework.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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