Bianca Jagger's DNA writ large all over Rafael Correa and Steven Donziger genomes

Funny story written by queen mudder

Monday, 30 December 2013

image for Bianca Jagger's DNA writ large all over Rafael Correa and Steven Donziger genomes
Sucking on a post-prandial cheroot (pic by George Dubya Bush)

New York - Two high profile crooks involved in Ecuador's shakedown of US super major Chevron have Nicaraguan-born human frights activist, sometime Rolling Stones groupie and star of their 1972 documentary Cocksucker Booze - uh, Blues! - Bianca PĂ©rez-Mora Macias Jagger as their natural birth mother according to a NATO report.

The illegitimate daughter of ruthless Chilean dictator General Augusto Pinochet and Queen Elizabeth shagged up-and-coming fledgling warmonger George W Bush as a recreational sideline to her escort girl career (sic) to farrow Ecuadorian President Rafael Correa.

Not content with one catastrophic alien hybrid for an offspring Ms Jagger has also been identified as the birth mother of feckless NYC shyster lawyer Steven Donziger whose $19billion Ecuadorian shakedown of Chevron is currently the subject of a RICO racketeering lawsuit in Manhattan.

NATO files about her brood are activities have been locked down since the Clinton/Gore second administration was plunged into scandal with the arrest and subsequent espionage conviction of FBI/KGB double agent Robert Hanssen.

Investigators who probed the disappearance of thousands of classified Federal files thought to have vanished as a direct result of Hanssen's spying career have never even hinted about the role of corrupt Ecuadorian national oil and gas producer PetroEcuador.

Fortunately it now appears that those missing secret papers were mere copies of NATO-held files which the FBI was tracking in a long-term op.

Commenting on this latest twist a correspondent for Big Oil Shagger magazine said today: "There'll be he'll to pay for if Bill Clinton turns out to be Steven Donziger's natural son."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

Do you dream of being a comedy news writer? Click here to be a writer!

Comedy spoof news topics
Go to top
readers are online right now!
Globey, The Spoof's mascot

We use cookies to give you the best experience, this includes cookies from third party websites and advertisers.

Continue ? Find out more