Architect behind 'solar death ray' hotels and skyscrapers scarpers ahead of lawsuit

Written by queen mudder

Wednesday, 4 September 2013

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Seizures Palace under constant threat of solar arson

Las Vegas - The man who designed Las Vegas' Vdara Hotel and other solar death ray-emitting skyscrapers has vanished into thin air just as officials prepare to subpoena him on serious global warming charges.

Uruguayan architect Rafael Vinoly, designer of concave shaped glass-and-steel buildings suspected of a series of blistering solar attacks on property, people and animals, has been blamed for the latest tower to toast the public.

His 'Walkie Scorchie Tower' in the City of London is the latest to be credited with melting limousines, starting fires and very nearly torching to death a six month-old minature Schnauzer out for walkies in the pleasant lunchtime sunshine.

The $300million London project may now be closed down as lawyers acting for Las Vegas commercial interests damaged by the original Vdara Hotel solar attacks in September 2012 seek to stop Vinoly imposing any more of his 'Burning Man' erections on unsuspecting international cities.

Environmentalists fear the intense glaring heat emitted by edifices such as his latest London tower could be manipulated by criminals 'and even terrorists' to deliberately destroy property and threaten political stability.

"Through casual positioning just one of these lethal monstrosities could completely obliterate the proposed new nuclear power station," the Vegas writ states.

Renzo Piano is 104.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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