Bras for men are an unexpected hit for Sparks and Mensa

Funny story written by IainB

Monday, 29 August 2011


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Sparks and Mensa, the shop for the intelligentsia, have revealed that this year's surprise hit clothing product has been bras for men.

"We were very surprised," said Mark Spencer, advertising vice president for Sparks and Mensa, or S&M as they are known. "We hadn't expected them to sell well at all. We named the range Moobras."

The bras are to counter a growing hidden problem among men.

"Over the past twenty years, men have been getting more and more overweight," said leading men's health guru, Doctor Ben Zidine. "This has led to a peculiar condition known colloquially as moobs. In much the same way as women need support for their, erm, I suppose they should now be called foobs. Anyway, Men need similar support. Failure to do so can lead to back problems, sagging moobs, loss of self esteem and athletes foot."

This problem was solved by Sparks and Mensa, who now offer a moob measuring service.

"There's quite a large range of sizes for moobs," said Spencer. "We strongly advise any man with moobs to come in and get measured. Getting an incorrect moobra is probably worse than no bra at all. So far, the most common size we're finding is 45C. We decided to do men's sizes in odd numbers so men didn't accidentally buy the wrong gender."

As most people have realised, men are a different shape to women. This is a deliberate ploy by evolution to allow them to fit together and produce more people. The difference in shape does mean that bras for women do not really fit men.

"I can vouch for that," said Foofoo Candi, a transsexual from Trafford. "Until the moobras came out, I was forever squeezing my pair into an ill-fitting bra. I'm a 41DD."

With the success of the range, Sparks and Mensa will be diversifying their range for the autumn.

"We're working on matching moobras and briefs," said Spencer. "Plus a sexy range. There's no reason why larger men can't be as sexy as thinner ones."

On one final note, it would appear that Doctor Ben Zidine is a doctor of music, and not at all qualified.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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