A homosexually-afflicted gentleman from Manchester has told how he received an unexpected Valentine's day card from an admirer which featured an enormous penis inside the card which popped up when he opened it.
Larry Sabu, 20, tried to explain his surprise when he flicked the greetings card open this morning as he stood naked in front of his gaping letterbox. He said:
"It was a shock to receive a Valentine's card, and extra special because of the lovely sentiment contained within, in the form of the huge, rigid, stand-up cock which almost poked my eye out!"
The lovely card had been delivered only moments before by randy bisexual postman Norman, who should, on no account, be allowed into readers' homes 'for a drink of water'.
