Written by victor nicholas

Saturday, 11 December 2010

image for Isle of Wight News - Pugh Promises Autobiography
Chapter Three - The Handshake

Isle of Wight Council Leader David Pugh held a press conference today after attending a ribbon cutting at a new eatery in Sandown to announce that he will be taking some time off in the New Year to write his autobiography.

"There is a time for all things and I feel that despite my need to serve my constituents by attending ribbon cuttings and photo opportunities related to essential new facilities there is only so many hours in the day. By writing my autobiography now I will be better able to reach out to all my constituents and share with them more on a more personal level than afforded by public ceremony, despite how special these events are to you and me."

"Those who know me know that I am more than willing to suffer personally for the greater good and this is no different."

Pugh says he has had little time to plan out his autobiography but confides "It will start with personal grooming, fatuous congratulatory statements about those with political or economic influence along with ribbon cutting of course and start from there.""

Primarily it will be about me and focus on my intentions to be seen as kind and modest in deed and action however it goes without saying that there will be a substantial amount of words dedicated to those who believe that I am kind and modest as well."

"For those who are fans of photography I have every intention that the volume be amply illustrated with photographs of me smiling or shaking hands or smiling and shaking hands at the same time together at events such as ribbon cuttings and the cutting of ribbons with or without photographic opportunities."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Isle of Wight

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