Intimate shots of bikini-clad Katia Zatuliveter found on Prince Harry's mobile phone

Funny story written by queen mudder

Monday, 6 December 2010

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Here's one that Andy Coulson hasn't managed to hack!

London - (Royal Mole/Ass Mess): Harry's 'just rubbing suntan lotion' all over pretty blonde intern Katia Zatuliveter's beauty spot.

The soft and peachy hillock was described today by anti-espionage cops as a scene of special scientific interest.

By this afternoon that was upgraded to area of outstanding natural booty (sic) after the image appeared unexpectedly on a Palace mobile.

Royal Protection Racket cops moved quickly, pumping out some disinformation garbage to distance Prince Ginger from the unfolding scandal.

But dozens of the intimate soft-focus poolside shots had already found their way onto the Royal Faecesbook page - soon proving hellishly more popular than Old Fatty Mountbatten's silly gob.

Quite how long Harry and Katia have been shagging - er...helping one another hone their Olympic medal-bid breaststroke skills! - is almost a state secret.

The luscious Miss Zee is holed up right now in a UK police detention center awaiting extradition back to Moscow.

Her erstwhile KGB chum Anna Kushchenko is 69.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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