London - (Reuterus & Ass Mess): The happy couple are to become the Earl and Countess of Loch Ness, Buckingham Palace has announced.
The hereditary title was last used by one of Bonnie Prince Charlie's carpetbaggers but fell into abeyance on his execution for High Treason.
It is now being revived following today's happy announcement that desperate royal wannabe Kate has finally bagged her man (sic).
Ancient manorial rights are believed to come with the conferment, including huntin', phishin' and shootin' rights over 60,000 prime Scottish acres.
Farm rents, woodland bursaries and various associated agricultural domain funds are likely to add to the royal pair's wedded bank balances a spokesman for Holyrood palace confirmed today.
The marriage date has yet to be announced but may coincide with the traditional Loch Ness anniversary of April 1st.
