Written by Herrdoktorfox

Monday, 9 August 2010

image for Botox Bandit
Padded coathanger collector Orson Carte captures the drama on his vintage Kodak Camera.

A woman dubbed the 'Botox Bandit' has finally been arrested after stealing/having umpteen cosmetic treatments reputably costing well over $5,000.

Seemingly,Tanya Hyde, 29, travelled around Florida having numerous wrinkle fillers, facials and various bits of cosmetic surgery as well-then paid with dud cheques or, as was the case, rushing out of clinics without paying. Despite numerous Police mugshots and TV coverage Tanya managed to elude capture due to endless facial changes. She was finally nabbed in a Dade County shopping mall toilet when her hand got stuck up her inflated crotch while wiping herself dry.

Dade County Sheriff, Rock 'quarter' Pounder takes up the story: "Well y'all, seems this little lady had over reached her limits. Due to having one too many labia enlargements her clit lips resembled two padded coat hangers and were overly sensitive to the touch. As a result when she was going about her sanitary hygeine business they snapped shut like a giant clam trapping her hand in the process! It's certainly one of them most amazing arrests ain't that the truth. Y'all....be sure to catch it on 'Police Action Camera' in the not too distant future folks, y'all have a nice day now y'hear!"

Kay Burley has ordered a bicycle pump from Halfords in order to Do-It-Herself as she feels under endowed in the nether regions.

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: botox




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