A long-standing spoof contributor of some renown has sensationally quit today, lamenting the 'dumbing-down' of his favourite web-site, 'TheSpoof.com.'
Retired headmaster Herbert Posset, more widely known by his pseudonym, Prof. Edward de Vere OBE,is highly regarded by many and indeed is a legend in his own mind.
'My articles do not appear to be receiving the notice, or indeed acclamation that they once did', he reported earlier today.
'I recently wrote a satire based on the Trojan War, entirely in dactylic hexameters, in the style of Homer's 'The Iliad'. Arguably it was better than the original, having in excess of 16000 lines. Amazingly it was read by only three people and received no stars and no comments', he complained.
Mr. Posset's satire about Hitler's persecution of the Jews, written entirely in Ancient Aramaic fared little better.
'I suppose I could have used Modern or Neo-Aramaic', he confessed, 'but I thought that would make the article too accessible'.
'I've tried everything to use the web-site to educate', he continued, 'but I now feel that far too many writers are here simply for a cheap laugh or to let off steam. I've set up discussion threads about Pinter, Tolstoy and my favourite, the Renaissance Poets, but people seem more interested in Katie Price and her tits, whoever she might be'.
'I'm not prepared to stoop to double entendres for a cheap laugh. My writing is more Charles Williams than Kenneth Williams'. he stated emphatically
So, it would appear that Mr. Posset has posted his last spoof, but fans will be relieved to hear that he has not given up writing altogether.
'I will now be concentrating on my next novel', he proudly announced. 'My previous 23 are currently with my publisher and I expect to hear from them any day'.
'In fact', he confided, 'I would already be published if it were not for one annoying stumbling block. I received an e-mail recently, confirming the genius of my work and offering to publish. They just needed my bank details so that they could pay the royalties directly into it.'
And the stumbling block?
'Ah well, none of the residents of the asylum are allowed a bank account you see.'
