Written by Abel Rodriguez

Monday, 19 July 2010

image for Kerry Katona Caught Playing With Her Lover, Adam Waldron's Shuttlecock
The lobby of The Mrs. Don Quixote Hotel in Marbella, Spain where Kerry and Adam stayed.

MARBELLA, Spain - Kerry Katona was showing off her fine-looking body while wearing a red bikini in the romantic city of Marbella Spain, a town noted for producing more fighting bulls than any other city in Europe.

Katona certainly was not shy about showcasing her new figure which she got courtesy of her three month diet.

Kerry said that her diet consisted of eating a hummingbird egg omelette for breakfast, a pair of female frog lips for lunch, and one cilantro crumpet for dinner.

She said that the diet worked because every night her lover would tell her that she was so delicious looking that he could subside on merely licking her as if she was a 30-food item buffet table.

Katona giggled and said that she loves the fact that Adam like her is a big fan of the oldies bands such as The Beatles, The Rolling Stones, The Who, and The Electric Prunes.

She also said that she loves the fact that Adam really enjoys playing her favorite outdoor game badminton.

In fact, it was reported by several of the Spanish newspapers that on several occasions she has been caught playing with Waldron's shuttlecock.

She blushed and said that she has no idea how in the world the paparazzi were able to see her and Adam in their hotel room shower stall, much less see her playing with his shuttlecock.

Waldron was asked what he thinks about Kerry's weight loss. He winked and said that all of her weight loss has even caused a fabtastic tightening in the lower recesses of her fantabulous loins.

He went on to say that Kerry is proud that she has finally agreed to get the hole in her septum fixed. She also will be going in to have the scar on her uvula removed, as well as she will have the stain on her G-spot completely lasered out.

Kerry was asked if it was true that Waldron has nicknamed her muffin Kitty Kat. She turned three shades of pink and refused to answer.

[EDITOR'S NOTE: I made a call to the highly respected English television presenter David Frost and he informed me that it is indeed a fact that Adam Waldron refers to Kerry Katona's muffin as Kitty Kat.]

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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