Samantha Stobbart - Limited Sympathy For Raoul Moat's Ex As She Trousers Six Figure Sum

Funny story written by Skoob1999

Monday, 19 July 2010

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image for Samantha Stobbart - Limited Sympathy For Raoul Moat's Ex As She Trousers Six Figure Sum
This Is Not A Taser.

It's a difficult question, yet one which really should be addressed: How do you get over the murderous rampage of a crazed gunman who sparked off the biggest manhunt in living memory?

It could be that a six figure fee from a leading Sunday redtop helps to ease the passage on the road to recovery.

Of course, crying a bit, however unconvincingly, always seems to score points. As Raoul Moat's ex-girlfriend Samantha Stobbart ably demonstrated in her exclusive News Of The Screws interview from her hospital bed.

Some cynics claim that if the interview is viewed and paused in HD, that the £ signs are clearly visible, reflected in Ms Stobbart's eyeballs.

Far be it from Skoob News to cast even the vaguest aspersions, but the public continue to question the wisdom of Ms Stobbart informing Mr Moat that she was dating the copper who had nicked him. Even though it was a blatant lie.

Could that have been the catalyst that sparked a rampage?

In all honesty, we wouldn't know.

But exercising the imagination, it doesn't take a great leap to figure out that telling your child's incarcerated, unstable, steroid addicted father that you're knocking off the man who had him banged up, may not be a really smart move. Particularly if it's a complete and utter lie.

Or maybe it was?

That six figure sum, it probably helped the recovery process.

Doesn't really help anybody else though.

Still, who's counting? What's done is done.

Next week - Living With A Psycho - My Twisted Sex Life With Raoul Moat - another six figure blockbuster.

We feel for you dear, really we do.

More as we get it.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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