Woman has Vuvuzela removed from her vagina

Funny story written by Rudolph Schlong

Monday, 5 July 2010


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Vuvuzelas do not smell of fish - or maybe they do sometimes

A 24 year old woman from East London was taken to hospital on Friday evening to have a vuvuzela removed from her vagina.

The vuvuzela became stuck in her vagina after she had watched the World Cup quarter final between Ghana and Uruguay but the woman would not say why or how it had got there.

Doctors believe the buxom beauty of African origin had got over excited during the match and may have used the plastic trumpet to relieve some tension after the game. They said she had inserted the vuvuzela, trumpet end first, but as she tried to remove it her vaginal walls contracted and the irritating horn became stuck fast.

The procedure to extract the vuvuzela took a couple of hours and the woman was said to have suffered no painful after effects.

Staff at the hospital said this is not the first time they had removed a vuvuzela from a woman's vagina and confessed it had been a regular occurrence during the World Cup.

'Either women in the UK are incredibly frustrated and have turned to a plastic trumpet for relief' quipped one junior doctor, 'Or they've taken the phrase 'Vuvuzelas are for cunts' a little too literally.'

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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