Jedward Star, Edward Grimes, Survives Assassination Attempt

Funny story written by Stevey G.

Monday, 5 July 2010

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Was Jedward the 'Target' of a failed assassination attempt?

Jedward star and unlikely pop-idol, Edward Grimes, was rushed to hospital yesterday after collapsing on stage.

The 18 year old performer, who was appearing with his twin-brother John, was seen to stumble and eventually collapse on stage, much to the surprise of the audience at the T4 concert at Weston-Super-Mare.

Ambulances were called and Edward was immediately rushed to hospital.

An official statement was released, reporting that Edward had 'broken his leg'.

This unlikely explanation has sparked rumours of a 'cover-up' and conspiracy theorists are already seeking their own alternatives, the most popular being that this was, in fact, a failed assassination attempt.

It is no secret that a great majority of the public regard Jedward as a couple of 'talentless twats' but up until now there have been no indications of death threats having been made.

The 'assassination' theory has been sparked by a number of witnesses who claim to have heard a loud bang immediately preceding the incident on stage.

Further evidence for this theory is provided by the eye-witness account of Mr. Kevin Spavine, who was attending a Star-Trek convention at the nearby Winter Gardens Pavillion.

'I heard a loud bang' says Spavine 'looked to my immediate left and spied a lone gunman on the grassy-knoll'

More on this story as it unfolds.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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