Tony Haywire, BP's famous chief, has been seen sailing around the Isle of Wight.
America is asking for his extradition to the United States where he will be tried for oil violations of the American coast.
'Put your finger in, Haywire!' exclaimed the American CIA boss 'you should be a the bottom of the sea, putting your finger in your hole not sailing on the seas.'
Estimates of the amount of oil spilling from the leak off the coast of America have increased. 'This is an economic disaster which will ruin our country' announced British Prime Minister Cameron 'measures will have to taken to raise taxes and cut almost everything to pay for all this. BP is too big to fail.'
'That sounds good sense' said the Governor of the Bank of England 'we cannot allow BP to go down.'
Shares in BP have reached the bottom of the sea and the hope is that they will block Haywire's hole before it gets too big.
