Alastair Dullthing has admitted that the UK cash crisis is so bad he is terrified to tell Gordon The Bully Brown in case he goes totally berserk.
There is not enough money to pay peoples pensions so the government will now need to consider raising the retirement age to 95 which is an old idea that he thought of years ago but this time it is seriously being considered.
Skeleton Mary Bones who died two years ago at age 94 now says she is coming back to claim her pension which is due to her because she worked all her life.
