Vanessa Perroncel flees Surrey home ahead of Toni Terry homecoming

Funny story written by queen mudder

Monday, 8 February 2010

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image for Vanessa Perroncel flees Surrey home ahead of Toni Terry homecoming
Much of Surrey is now a no-go ghetto for the raven-haired French beauty

London - (Penalty Box): Next week's expected Toni Terry homecoming has proved a Wayne Bridge too far for the dark-haired French beauty.

A £750K redundancy payoff from ex-lover John Terry has seen Vanessa Perroncel leg it from Chelsea FC's very own Wisteria Lane to a secret central London hideaway.

Pals reckon the cheque will finance a deposit on a swanky new Central London penthouse, remedial pastic surgery and a much needed life insurance upgrade.

Toni Terry's return from a Dubai holiday to her Warren Lane, Oxshott Heath matrimonial home has made much of Surrey a Perroncel no-go ghetto.

The Chelsea captain's long-suffering missus is reported to have spurned the chance of a Valentine's Day reunion with her love-rat husband.

"Instead of a Valentine's card she's sending John one of those one hundred quid divorce advice tokens from some topnotch matrimonial lawyers," sources close to her hairdressers said today.

There's only one Gary Lineker.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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