Hidden numerology of John Terry £137k fraud trial

Funny story written by queen mudder

Sunday, 7 February 2010


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Wannabe premiership Mr Fixit Faisal Madani denies all charges

London - (Pseudomathematics): An ancient occult divination system behind the secret science of hidden credit card numbers will be laid bare before Southwark Crown Court this week.

In the dock is Chelsea captain John Terry's 'old mucker' Faisal Madani who is facing £137,000 plastic fraud charges.

These include £37,000's worth of the Terry family's unpaid Xmas 2007 bill from the Dubai Royal Mirage hotel.

Serious Fraud Office charges say convicted scammer Madani, a wannabe Premiership freebies Mr Fixit, has plenty of previous form connected to the present indictment.

In April 2008 he was jailed for nine months on 18 counts of fraud.

These were linked to the sale of sporting memorabilia carrying fake autographs of footballers Michael Owen and Steven Gerrard.

But Tarot card reading consultants reckon it's all a mix-up connected to the legendary 137 London bus route.

Whether this will form part of Madani's defence is unclear at this stage.

The iconic route departs from a bus stop near former Streatham brothel madam Cynthia Payne's home at 32 Ambleside Avenue, SW16.

It's main dropping off point is at Chelsea Football Club's Stamford Bridge ground before going on to a special request stop at Tyburn Way, historic site for treason executions, and onwards to the Oxford Circus head stop.

The 137 bus features on a spelndid mural in the Dubai Royal Mirage hotel, named after the rather dubious Shaikh McTomb Raider family's claims to the UAE throne.

A website consulted by Maidani prior to his 2008 fraud trial described the luxury resort hotel as 'The One and Only Royal Mirage, resplendent with Millenium Domes, Rich fabrics of deception, mosaics (sic)/Kate Moss aches and carved Prince Jefri Archer arches.'

Madani has vowed to bring down ex-England captain John Terry in a bid to prove his own innocence.

Ex-Terry mistress Vanessa Perroncel is firmly out of the equation having accepted a reported £750,000 bung from Terry about their alleged love affair.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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