Dealers prepare for 2012 games with tender process

Funny story written by Raffles Cholmondley Smyth

Tuesday, 19 January 2010

image for Dealers prepare for 2012 games with tender process
Some drugs, yesterday (there's none left now)

London's drug dealers are 'gearing' up for the London Games by entering the tendering process for the lucrative contract to be the official narcotics supplier to the 2012 games.

The games organiser, the ODA, today posted an electronic tender via Facebook's as yet undeveloped online e-tendering system for the "Exclusive supply of Class A, B and C narcotics and hallucinogens to the London 2012 games".

With demand expected to be 'high' from punters, athletes and of course the media industry the contract could run into millions.

Delbert Wilkins of DW Enterprises (Brixton) expects competition to be fierce. Earlier today he said, "There have already been samples requested from all over central government and the ODA as part of the pre-tender stage. The tender was supposed to be complete by now but we had to keep sending more samples, then we couldn't get hold of anyone for days, then they'd call me again about 2 in the morning on a Saturday asking for more 'samples'."

Wilkins company already holds the large contract to supply the BBC and is expected to be a front runner for the 2012 contract.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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