Farces sweetheart Dame Vera Lynn to be buried in Sellafield landfill

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Monday, 2 November 2009

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image for Farces sweetheart Dame Vera Lynn to be buried in Sellafield landfill
Still milking it 70 years on

London - (We'll Meat Again): Relentless World War II self-publicist Dame Vera Bynn Laden is to be carted off to landfill for the sake of the nation's health.

The daft as a brush croonette is a perennial shoo-in during Remembrance Week services.

"She first blagged her way into the Royal British Legion's coffers back in '66," an MoD source commented.

"We've tried very hard to get rid of her but she's one of the old Queen Mother's little bastards - like George Bush Senior."

Lynn, 99, once aided and abetted UK Prime Monster Harold Wilson in an attempted military coup d'etat which her brother bankrolled with stolen Nazi gold dental crowns.

Some reckon she also shagged Kissinger, Khruschev and Pope JP2 Lodge but claims to forgotten all about it these days.

Saturday's Festival of Remembrance could be a cure for amensia.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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