Under pressure PM, Gordon Brown today announced an idea that is set to make him the most popular man in Britain.
Brown who despite his strange shape has proved to be as slippery as an Eel!
In fact Mr.Brown is more slippery than a slippery person that went to slippery school to perfect his slipperyness and left with a masters degree in slipping about.
However, dear readers,we should get back to the details of the announcement which is brilliant in its simplicity.
In one fell swoop, Brown aims to win a surprise, snap election whilst promising to reduce crime, binge drinking, paedophile incidents, under age drinking, smoking & pregnancy, mini motorbike nuisance, fighting over fat girls in kebab shops, internet usage including gaming and surfing for porn, having to pay pocket money or getting up in the small hours to rescue stranded children by sending everyone in Britain between the ages of 4 and 19 to China on a free fortnight's holiday paid for by the British Government in co operation with British Airways (who need the work).
Brown is gambling on the Chineses authorities paranoia about swine flu infected westerners to lead to the whole lot being rounded up for two weeks and trapping them under armed guard in hotels and hospitals whilst being fed junk food!
A grateful nation will enjoy two weeks peace from its dreadful Children and will surely turn out en masse to vote during the snap election that will be held after the first week of National Peace and Quiet Fortnight.
Brown and Balls are working closely with Lord Mandleson on a secret plan to ensure that the entire BA fleet is unflyable for an extra week if more than 90% of Voters support him!