London, UK - A family who donated their deceased father's liver to medical science is sadden by the news that it ended up on the buffet table of the House Of Lords as a pâté during the Queen's birthday celebrations, causing ten members to become violently ill. The House Of Lords members are said to be recuperating in hospital. The family wants an immediate public inquiry to be conducted.
Chef Norman Bramsay has stated that he sources all of his ingredients locally and can't understand how the liver of a Yorkshire man ended up on the buffet table at Westminster. Although he empathizes with the family, he stated that he doesn't believe an inquiry is warranted.
"The deceased man did actually have some strong connections to the House, having been an advisor to their committee regarding the privatization of medical care in Britain. My suspicion is that the food poisoning is all the result of a dubious set of circumstances. These old boys are always playing practical jokes on each other. I hazard a guess that the deceased had set this all up, prior to his demise; a last act of desperation used to encourage the members to vote favourably on a bill to allow privatization. One need only investigate his will and, in particular, the executor of the will in order to get some answers to this mystery."
When asked by reporters if he was hinting at some form of sabotage/blackmail regarding the selection of buffet table meats, Mr. Ramsay replied, "Of course I'm (expletives deleted) saying that, do I have to spell it out for you, you ignorant, gutter inhabiting...(expletives deleted)... press...(expletive deleted)... sons of...(expletive deleted). You silly little (expletive deleted)'s.