Written by Monkey Woods

Sunday, 12 April 2009

image for Drunken Woman Takes Piss Out Of Muslims On Bus
EY, LETSAVALOOKA Y'SPEAR!

There was more drama in the West Midlands today, when a drunken woman travelling on a bus began to interrogate and abuse a group of Muslim women, causing them distress and embarrassment, according to an eyewitness.

The drunk was sitting downstairs at the front of the 126 service from Wolverhampton to Dudley, when she noticed a group of Muslim women sitting across the aisle, tending to their young children, who were in their prams.

The 'lady', who had drunk approximately 'Too Much', asked them:

"A'YOU FROM NIGERIA?"

The Muslim ladies looked confused, so, for clarity, the ragged, tousle-haired, old bitch yelled:

"Y'KNOW, NI-GE-RIA!"

as one does when trying, in vain, to explain a simple command to a Balearic waiter. The Muslim group became embarrassed and somehwat intimidated, not to mention nervous, and stayed silent.

The 'lady', who was white, and aged around 49, but could have been as young as 19, bawled:

"WHERE Y'FROM? NI-GE-RIA? AF-RI-CA?"

After a brief interlude, and a look around to see who else was watching the spectacle, the blathered witch changed her tack, telling them:

"AH LIKE Y'CLOZE! - NIIIICE!"

By now, other passengers had started to voice their disapproval to each other, and one man sitting about three seats behind the incident, said:

"Why don't you shut your f*cking mouth, you stupid cow?"

The drunk, who the bus driver later confirmed, was known to him by way of his late-night bus-driving, rolled her eyes in mock surprise, and appeared to be about to initiate a confrontation with the gentleman, when one of the Muslim ladies tried to take the sting out of the situation by saying:

"Belgium. We from Belgium."

This surprising admission distracted the old sap from her mission, and she asked:

"BELGIUM? OOOH NIIIICE. IS THA' IN GERMANY?"

Several people laughed, but there was more. The woman leaned to her right and told another Asian woman:

"GARLIC AN' ONIONS - ME BEST FRIENDS IS GARLIC AN' ONIONS!"

The Asian woman left the bus at the next stop, and the drunken lady then decided she had had enough of the lack of opportunities for discussion, and rose to get off at a stop further on. She told the driver as he opened the door to let her off:

"NI-GE-RIANS THEM WOMEN. AM OFF OME F'ME TEA NOW!"

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: Racism




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