British and German international peacekeepers have informed the EU and the desperate people of the Congo that they have chosen to retrain as morticians and gravediggers.
The UK General in charge of the peacekeeping forces for the EU, Gen Hennie Egglayer said:
"Peacekeepin'? What does it really mean? After all, every peace we British have ever tried to keep has slipped away from us. The American colonies, for example, have become the most violent place on earth despite the empire's attempts to civilize the savages. India was once a tranquil haven for tea drinking, gin and tonic and cricket, not to mention British big business. Now Bombay with its new fangled crazy name is in flames. That is not to mention the downfall of Rhodesia and the other Anglo- African protectorates...
"We British will be there in the Congo and the other hopelessly embattled regions of our postcolonial empire. But now our mission will be to bury the dead...It is one of the christian works of mercy, after all..."
