The Mirror offers free melanin to every reader

Funny story written by Steddyeddy

Wednesday, 10 December 2008

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A non-melanin using Mirror reader

Continuing its efforts to expand social responsibility, the Mirror is giving away a year's supply of the drug melanin to every reader.

Familiar to those who drink Chinese milk or eat Irish pork, melanin is important for the skin in protecting people from the Sun.

Medical editor of the Mirror, Dr Harry Shipman (no relation) said that the newspaper had an obligation to protect its readers from the Sun. He explained that over the years, the Sun newspaper has been increasingly relying on sex advertisements, premium rate telephone lines and cash-back phone offers to lure people in, and it was the duty of the Mirror to offer some form of protection against this.

He concluded that instead of having to trail around in a very non-environmentally friendly manner looking for Chinese milk or Irish pork products, simply taking melanin provided by the Mirror everyday would help protect Mirror readers from the Sun.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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