Following his £2million suspension over inappropriate remarks made to a hotel waiter from Barcelona on his answering machine regarding the sexual indiscretions of his slutty granddaughter, Jonathon Ross today announced the line up for his comeback TV extravaganza.
Wossy's guests will all be Wossys too!
Diana Woss will be the opening attraction. The much plastic surgeryised soul diva has been hand picked by Jonathon Ross on account of her surname. She will perform Up The Ladder To The Woof, in honour of her former backing singstresses the Supwemes.
Following hot on the heels of Diana Woss will be Nick Woss, who will chat about Cwimewatch for a bit.
After Nick Woss comes Jonathon Woss's brother, Paul Woss, who will spill the beans on Philip Schofield and Fern Bwitten.
The final studio guest will be Woss Kemp, ex East-Ender Gwant Mitchell, talking about shitting his pants while filming some of the world's most notorious gangs on Ross Kemp On Gangs.
The musical conclusion will be provided by BWOSS, singing 'When Will I Be Famous?'
Wemember Them?
A BeeBC spokesperson denied that Woss was firing a veiled broadside at the corporation with his choice of guests, saying instead that for someone who couldn't pronounce his R's the project constituted a severe challenge.
Like that singing dustman in Fools And Horses who sang Cwying with Waquel.
More as we get it.
Pwobabwy.
