Mystery surrounds a giant lego man found washed up on Brighton beach who has been undergoing psychiatric testing in order to find out where he came from.
It appears that this case is remarkably similar to that of a man found wandering in Kent in 1995. Both men refused to speak and had no memory of how they came to be in the sea. The only difference in this case is that the lego giant is crap at playing the piano and he is also refusing to eat.
It is thought that he may have learning difficulties as his plastic shirt bears the slogan "no real than you are" which, despite offering endless possible anagrams even without the missing word 'more', lego man refuses to even hold a pen in his hand.
Derek Seed of Brighton Social Services says, "If this goes on much longer we shall just have to dump him back in the sea. He won't do anything! We took him for a walk but when we got to the bumpy bit at the pedestrian crossing he just stood there. He scares me so much. Come to think of it we're getting a bit fed up with cleaning bricks out of the toilet after he's been ".
There may be a reprieve for the lego giant though as Radio 2 are said to be on the lookout for someone with absolutely nothing to say.