Lancashire - (Rioters): A village pub identified by online reference site Wikipederast as the gentle hub of underage gay commercial sex has hit back at inaccuracies regarding its cash-cow operations.
Denshaw's Golden Fleas Working Men's Club landlord Jim Bunce said today that village hookers are a pretty wholesome lot and have been microchipped under strict EU-extended pet plan laws, monitored by latest Sat-Nav technology.
"All our rent boys and their grateful patrons are regularly wormed, de-liced and probed for scrot-rot in the local Tesco STD clinic.
"Of course we do have the odd problem with a few freelance scrubbers," Bunce added, "mostly pimply rough-trade opportunists from nearby Oldham and Ashton-under-Lyne."
Denshaw's mayor has challenged the online site to upgrade its current information and take down 'lurid pictures of his three sons Dave, Matt and Phil' engaged in gravity-defying acts of unprecedented depravity with a local Old Gloucestershire Blackspot breeder.
John Prescott is 69.
