London sleazebags swarm to club's Paris Hilton night

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 15 April 2008

image for London sleazebags swarm to club's Paris Hilton night
'like she's just knocked off from a gruelling fifty quid-a-pop sleaze-session at Max Mosley's orgy apartment'

London - (A-List Sewage Mess): Paris Hilton drew a record number of London's stagnant water bottom-feeders last night as she graced a Mayfair nightclub with her pointless toxic presence.

The somewhat faded 27 year-old peroxide bimbo didn't even think it necessary to touch up her now-greying roots as she flounced into Mahiki with Good Charlotte musician (sic) Benji Madden in tow.

Even her black and silver ensemble looked like a cheap and nasty $200 outfit from some M25 backwater rag merchant.

"Makes her look like she's just knocked off from a gruelling fifty quid-a-pop sleaze-session at Max Mosley's orgy apartment," one London clubber commented.

After ten consecutive impromptu visits to the Ladies Room to 'powder her nose' Paris gave a feature-length 10 minute performance of slobbering all over her American paramour, groping his family jewels area and very nearly causing him to burst forth from his Moschino-for-Men snakeskin jeans.

Then to the delight of Z-List London celebs like Big Brother's porny Marchant twins - who at least had had their hair roots touched up relatively recently - she then gyrated a faux-lapdance like some drunken kamikaze weirdo about to go down on an unsuspecting landmark erection.

Kate Moss is in hiding.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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