Britain is bracing itself for a further bout of Apocalypse and Armageddon tonight after millions of people were left wet and cold.
Newspapers struggled to cope with their own hyperbole as Doomsayers predicted further wind and rain tomorrow, possibly in conjunction with cold and damp.
However there was disappointment in some circles as the arrival of the four Horsemen had to be postponed due to the slightly wintry conditions.
A press release issued on behalf of the horsemen said that they had been delayed by leaves clogging up their mounts' hooves.
It continued: 'However, the general public should not be worried, as the normal service of war, famine, pestilence and death will soon be resumed.'
A spokesman for God would not be drawn on whether Judgement Day would occur by Friday.
