London - (Hardcore Ass Mess): Perennial peroxide entertainer Madonna-Kebab is to release her swansong album for Wannabe Brothers entitled Hardcore Candy - a tribute to UK fraudster property developers Nick and Christian Candy.
The album will be out on April 1st and is dedicated to the two bastard siblings she bore to Lord Ashcroft - the Thatcherite former Tory Party chairman and chief fundraiser, proprietor of a Belize-registered cocaine money laundering bank and top bumk-bandit bailiff for George W Bush during his governorship of Texarse.
The Candy brothers are currently top of the UK Serious & Disorganised Crime Agency's most wanted list after securing a series of billion-dollar UK property heists in collusion with Treasury stooges like Gorgon Brown and Alistair Darling, bankrolled by the feckless Emir of Qatar.
Also included in the swag bag is the singer's Wiltshire home Ashcombe House, a mansion she stole in a NATO military intelligence sting designed to identify nuke-dealing Opus Dei financiers bankrolling cults like Scientology and Cabbage-la (sic).
"Should have called it 'One Born Every Minute', a top Fraud Squad source chuckled today.
