Supermarket Aiming Even Higher

Funny story written by Ministry

Saturday, 27 March 2004

image for Supermarket Aiming Even Higher
Cindy obviously shops at Tesco

In its bid to offer literally everything to the consumer, a major (uk) supermarket chain (Legally I can't say which but it begins with T) has decided to stock small arms on its shelves.

True to form, there will be three ranges of both pistols and sub machine-guns. The Value 9mm for instance, looks like a pistol but you'd probably be better throwing it than shooting it, whereas the Finest SMG will come in a pretty silver and black case.

Also true to form, you won't be able to get hold of any consumables for the new ranges of firearms (they did the same with the popcorn maker) so you'll have to look elsewhere for ammo.

Obviously they will not be supplied to anyone under the age of 18 (unless they look over 18) and each weapon will come with a warning label which reads "This is not a toy. Not suitable for children under 216 months. GM free(ish). Vote Labour."

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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