Diana inquest: crash interrupted massive $50 million Dodi coke deal

Funny story written by queen mudder

Tuesday, 2 October 2007

image for Diana inquest: crash interrupted massive $50 million Dodi coke deal
Diana only really interested in billionaires like Forstmann

Royal Courts of Justice, London - (DeadEnd Mess): The inquest into the 1997 death of Princess Diana and Dodi Fayed has heard French investigative magistrates' testimony that the car crash fatally interrupted a massive $50 million cocaine deal that the Egyptian playboy was broking to finance his future courtship of the wayward princess.

"Dodi Fayed knew he was only a ten-a-penny player in Diana's retinue of eager fellaters," coroner Lord Justice Scott Baker was told today.

"She'd only just finished shagging US billionaire Teddy Forstmann who had more petty cash to spend in a week than Dodi could ever muster in a decade," the courtroom heard.

"And there were plenty of others lining up to service her hormonal needs which, according to latest available MI5 figures, show that during her marriage she'd managed to shag up to 200 mostly willing males."

On the night of the tragic crash French secret service officers were trailing Dodi who had been withdrawing huge suitcase-fulls of money on the French Riviera that summer ahead of a Paris rendezvous with Russian go-betweens brokering the Colombian deal.

Tomorrow the court will hear about what happened to the $$$s that Dodi stashed in the Ritz Hotel deposit box on the evening of 30 August 1997.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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