London - (ReUterus & Ass Mess): Osama Bin Laden's new daughter-in-law was once shagged by footballer George Best according to Foreign Orifice sources today.
Jane Felix-Browne-Bin Laden, 51, apparently also shagged Alex Ferguson, Diego Maradona, Lord Lucan, Ronnie Biggs, the Yorkshire Ripper, Prince Philip, half the Provisional IRA's top commanders, Cliff Richard, Dick Cheney and Shergar the Wonderhorse.
"We think there has been a Mata Hari-like pattern here," FO sources said today.
Last week Ms Felix-Browne was questioned over her idiot half-brother Lord Browne, the ex-BP CEO and daftass perjurer stripped of his cushy oil industry sinecure after UK Law Lords called him a lying toerag in public.
She has since complained that police officers have smeared her with espionage allegations and asked her where she got a consignment of radioactive Plutonium 210, similar to the one that pickled former KGB turncoat Alexander Litvinenko on Halloween 2006.
Her recent Home Office application for a visitor's visa for her "poor ailing father-in-law" is under review by immigration authorities.
