Drug rumours increase, as dog-faced Britney Spears urinates on red carpet

Written by Breeze

Tuesday, 13 February 2007

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Britney - a bit of a dog

Recent tabloid photos, showing Britney Spears out and about for the first time since her divorce from Kevin Federline, have re-ignited rumours of drug abuse.

The once fresh faced princess of pop looked as rough as a badger's hole when she appeared at the premiere of her new film, 'Big Jugs 2'.

Wearing a Versaci pyjama top and crotchless panties, Miss Spears appeared to stumble on the red carpet and had to be helped by two burly minders.

Refusing to sign autographs, the former Mousekateer stopped only briefly, to urinate in front of stunned fans, before pulling up her knickers and dashing into the theatre.

Producer of 'Big Jugs 2', Arty Titwobble, told us, "Britney is fine, she's just a little tired and emotional..... her breasts are absolutely magnificent in the movie." he added.

Friends of the troubled pop star, however, have expressed concern at her recent bizarre behaviour.

"Britney's losing it," one source, close to the star told us, "At home, she has taken to wearing a hat made out of tin foil, apparently aliens have told her to kill prostitutes."

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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