Man Buys Pommel Horse, And Brings It Home On The Bus

Funny story written by Monkey Woods

Saturday, 4 July 2020

image for Man Buys Pommel Horse, And Brings It Home On The Bus
A man giving a demonstration of the apparatus in the shop

A man has revealed how an afternoon spent trawling charity shops for cheap books and CDs, resulted in the extravagant, and somewhat unlikely purchase of a pommel horse, as used in men's gymnastics.

Myke Woodson, of Oaf-on-Sea, was traipsing through the city's mainly boarded-up shopping areas last autumn, and entered the premises of Scope.

He quickly ascertained there was nothing to interest him of a literary nature, then rifled through the shop's CD section, with the same result. On his way out, however, his eyes met with a piece of equipment that immediately caught his attention

Standing in a quieter area - presumably because of its size - was a pommel horse, a piece of artistic gymnastic apparatus rarely seen in a charity shop, and he was seized with a desire to own it.

The price was an incredible £10.

After handing over the cash, Woodson was then faced with the problem of having to get it to the bus station. It was heavy and cumbersome, but he manfully dragged it into George Street, across King Edward Street, and into Jameson Street, where he drew stares - but no assistance - from other shoppers.

Finally reaching Ferensway, he entered the bus station. When his bus arrived, the driver raised his eyebrows at the enormous pommel horse, but many years of bus-driving experience in the city had taught him to keep his mouth shut. Woodson boarded, and stored the horse in the area allocated for pushchairs and wheelchairs.

On reaching his destination, he alighted from the vehicle, and dragged the apparatus down his mam's street to her house, where he 'tethered' it in its 'stable' - her garage, where it's been gathering dust ever since, much to her annoyance.

Laughed Woodson:

"Thank Christ it wasn't a pair of Isometric Bars!"

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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