Sophisticated Mod God Paul Weller has broken a silence that has been held within his family for over 4 decades.
Weller revealed that during a trip to Paris in the late 1950's his mother had a brief dalliance with an unknown French boy.
The Spoof can reveal that the liaison which produced Weller, the style Icon to at least 3 generations, was with none other than Arsen Wenger, now the Svengali of Arsenal Football Club.
Paul's 'Dad' John Weller has admitted to realising that his son looked nothing like him from an early age and didn't share his own interest in the building trade. However the penny didn't drop until the young singer songwriter began enjoying the finer things in life such as fine wine Gauloise, garlic and singing in occasional O level French.
Wenger has refused to comment and a source has suggested that this is because Weller cannot play football for toffee and is rumoured to support Chelsea.