Written by Jaggedone

Friday, 8 December 2017

image for Reflections on Real Life - Brit Nitwit cements microwave to his cracked head hoping for some warm vibes!
This maniac could do with a 'micro-waving' too!!

The extent of British eccentricity is renowned around the planet, thank you Mr.Bean! However, sometimes the boundaries of Brits being totally bonkers (I also am quite a nutter) are taken a step too far as in the case of one total crank who cemented a microwave to his head!

Wolverhampton, better know for being the center of the 'Black Country' (not a racist connotation BTW) and black pudding (oops, sorry I just repeated myself in the form of a burp after imagining swallowing black pudding, ghastly stuff old bean, not black beans BTW), has now revealed the prize for 2017 Brit Maniac of the year by exposing a man with a microwave cemented to his bonce!

He had an air pipe stuck in his mouth so he could breathe, and when asked why he cemented a microwave to his rather damaged head, he answered:

"Well mate, I heard this fucking storm was approaching, Storm Caroline her name, and due to the fact I'm unemployed, can't pay the heating bills, and felt quite nippy, I thought I'd brick myself indoors, and cement this thing on my head!"

"Yes sir but what about those ghastly, dangerous, radiation waves passing through your brain?"

"What fucking brain? That thing's been brain-dead a long time!"

So there you have it; Brit eccentricity at its very best, and now "Microwave Brainstorming" is being adopted by UK's brain-damaged youth (too much smart-phoning) as the latest 'kick' in how to not be like your parents!!

The story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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Topics: british, Microwave

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