New terror tactics have been ordered by Dictator in waiting Mariana Rajoy. In a new desperate bid to get his hands on the wealthy Gibraltar Peninsula, Rajoy is, contrary to repeated EU requests, continuing to obstruct everyone who comes and goes from Gibraltar.
Where previously it took 15 mins to cross the border, Rajoy has used military style National Guard soldiers to enforce intricate searches of every vehicle and person crossing into Spain or Gibraltar. Deliberately causing queues averaging 8 hours, Rajoy screamed this morning "Give me Gibraltar or I'll scream and scream and scream until I'm sick!".
Frequently bursting into uncontrolled sobbing, he said "Water cannon will now be used on women and children in the queues and my Guardia will throw Straw Donkeys at them. If you think Franco was a terrifying bully, I'll make him look like Mary feckin Poppins Aaaargh!!!".
