London - Someone has gone and lobbed a bloody great big turd at a portrait of Her Maj in Westmonster Abbey.
And it's completely f++ked up the pic's Royal Tiara.
The snake oil on canvas painting was on display in the Abbey's Chapter Eleven Bankruptcy House alcove, depicting the Queen in a State of Undress.
This morning a man wearing a brown suit and breathing equipment lobbed a fresh two and a half pounder slap bang into the middle of the Diamond Jubilee commemorative painting.
"It was crap," he was later seen tweeting, "just like the portrait; bloody woman looks just like Hugh Laurie's daft Prince George in Blackadder III."
The 10ft x 6ft canvass will now be hosed down at the Archbishop of Canterbury's convenience or nearest unisex bathroom depending on its state.
Commenting on the PR disaster a Palace spokesperson said 'sh+t sticks, you prole' before slamming the phone down on our reporter.
The Marchioness of Upper Slaughter's chihuahua is 5 tomorrow.