US drones to patrol London terror hot spots

Funny story written by queen mudder

Thursday, 23 May 2013


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image for US drones to patrol London terror hot spots
On patrol over Barking in the Isle of Dogs

London - Fresh from Idaho sheep herding duties a consignment of six US unmanned combat air vehicles is enroute to London on emergency deployment following a Brit squaddie's machete attack murder outside Woolwich Barracks on Wednesday.

Announcing the emergency deal this evening President Obama said the measure is part of the USA's latest counter-terror strategy targeting badass terror vibes ahead of the Brit-hosted G8 Conference in June.

Overall control of drones will rest with UK operational commanders from the same military security unit which deployed surface-to-air missile launchers on the roof of a South London tower block during last year's London Olympics.

However the global nerve center powering all US unmanned combat air vehicles will remain at the Pentagon's Area 51, Roswell, Nevada state-of-the-art drone hub under the command of ex-First Earth Battallion commander General Albert Stubblebine III.

And not with the Brits' RAF Fylingdales Command HQ, also known as the 'Menwith Balls Place'.

Commenting on the move UK TV news reports said the drones will be armed with the latest microwave death ray systems designed to take out any street target within a 25 mile radius of an individual drone's flight path.

That target could theoretically include - for example - a suspected terrorist caught urinating on the Queen's Highway at three o'clock in the morning.

Or a five-man hornets' nest of radical extremists on the 11.15 to Tooting Broadway Farmers' Market, that well-known London hot bed of terrist stuff.

Of course we will never know the ID of the man - or woman - behind overall control of the triggers that will ensure a rapid response to any more terror attacks.

Catch sight of the first London drone patrol early tomorrow morning beginning with Barking in the Isle of Dogs.

The funny story above is a satire or parody. It is entirely fictitious.

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